Tuesday, January 03, 2006
It's Hard to Believe
It’s hard to believe what physicists are telling us these days about the fundamental nature of matter. It seems that subatomic particles aren’t particles after all, nor are they waves. They’re now thought to be strings - shimmering, vibrating strings. It’s hard to believe. The notion of strings tangles my reasoning in knots. Do you think these physicists are just stringing us along?
(Isn’t it hard to believe that I’d be brazen enough to write such awful puns?)
Further, we’re told these strings exist in eleven dimensions. I have no problem clearly visualizing up to ten dimensions, but an eleventh? It’s hard to believe.
It’s also hard to believe how much weight I gain after just one day of gluttony, and how long and difficult it is to remove. Again and again I resolve to eat less. This occurs usually after a large meal. Somehow, before a meal, eating less doesn’t enter my mind.
Speaking of minds, Harry Nelson Pillsbury was an American Chess Champion. He was famous for his ability to play simultaneous chess games blindfolded. His personal record, achieved in Moscow in 1902, was twenty-two simultaneous games. When he wanted to add a little extra showmanship, he would mix in some games of checkers or cards while giving a simultaneous exhibition. The current record is held by a Belgian, George Koltanowski. In 1980, he played fifty-six blindfold games simultaneously, winning fifty, tying six, and losing none. It’s hard to believe.
But all of the above is relatively easy to believe when compared to the New York Yankees’ current slump. They can’t hit. They can’t pitch. They can’t score runs. It too is hard to believe.
(Isn’t it hard to believe that I’d be brazen enough to write such awful puns?)
Further, we’re told these strings exist in eleven dimensions. I have no problem clearly visualizing up to ten dimensions, but an eleventh? It’s hard to believe.
It’s also hard to believe how much weight I gain after just one day of gluttony, and how long and difficult it is to remove. Again and again I resolve to eat less. This occurs usually after a large meal. Somehow, before a meal, eating less doesn’t enter my mind.
Speaking of minds, Harry Nelson Pillsbury was an American Chess Champion. He was famous for his ability to play simultaneous chess games blindfolded. His personal record, achieved in Moscow in 1902, was twenty-two simultaneous games. When he wanted to add a little extra showmanship, he would mix in some games of checkers or cards while giving a simultaneous exhibition. The current record is held by a Belgian, George Koltanowski. In 1980, he played fifty-six blindfold games simultaneously, winning fifty, tying six, and losing none. It’s hard to believe.
But all of the above is relatively easy to believe when compared to the New York Yankees’ current slump. They can’t hit. They can’t pitch. They can’t score runs. It too is hard to believe.
